15 posts tagged “emo”

Things/ people I miss right now:

• Enzo (Langga, I wish I spent more time with you before I left. =( I miss you the most.)
• Home cooking
• Having to talk really fast in Bisaya. Here, I only speak English (with an American accent, they say) and Tagalog.
• Baboy! Gusto ko ng baboy! Porkchop, lechon kawali, pork belly, barbecue, chicharon, basta baboy!
• My Manila/ Cebu nightlife. At least back home, I get to go out at least once a week or so. Here, I'm just too chicken to explore and besides, I dont have anyone to hang out with. No barkada to speak of, nada. (Awww, loser!)
• I miss Pearl Drive and the glory days of PSRC and the lunch group.
• I miss going to gigs! Waahhhhh...... =(
• I miss my purple (*gag) room. Tata picked out the color for the room and I ended up with it when I was kicked out of our yellow and green room since Enzo was born. Teehee. I miss soundtrips and just lying on my sauna bed.
• I miss my Mom and our parlor trips, my Dad's always-funny jokes, Tata's bullying antics, Pangkoy's midnight snacks and Enzo waking me up rudely. Teehee.
• I miss the Peruvian kids. Mark, peace na tayo tsong. Nikkiboy, miss na kita my other kapatid.
• I miss my girlfriends. *hay. I miss Ail's LOL laugh, Karen's 2am crazy laugh marathon, Doris' whiny Flucky voice, and Jeanice's presence. Love you girls. Here's to our 10th.
• I miss the guyfriends I "lost" along the way. You know who you are. I wish I can mend ties with you again someday. Gosh, I "lost" 3 good guyfriends last year! Grabe, ang hilig makipag-away ng lola. =p
• I even miss jologs bus music. Man, gimme Cueshe anytime! They're a symphony to my ears compared to the "pagsasamba" mosque music they play all day long here. =(
• I miss . . him =( (LDR na ba ito?) 

Things/ people that help me through homesickness:

• Mga babae sa opisina. For Joi's far-out jokes and thoughtfulness, Filip's amazing attitude, Melisa's tarayness, Ces' motherly advices, Arlie's sweetness; thank you Lord for giving me these friends.
• Kape, kape. As useless. And oh, Tiramisu cake.
• Internet! 
• Watching TV series on my laptop
• My mp3 player.
• Reij, Liver, Ivy, Cobra and Justine, Arlie's flatmates. Friends in Dubai I love hanging out with, when I get the time. 
• Inquirer website and PEP. Tee hee. Nothing like catching up on local news and errr... showbiz scandals.
• The Filipino food section in Carrefour hypermarket. =) I swear, I squealed with glee when I saw Purefoods Corned Beef the other day. Brasilian corned beef is too bland.
• Jun Encarnacion parlor. Yes, meron dito. 
• Emails. Thank you people.

I'll be 3 months here next week. Dunno when I'll snap out of this emotion sickness.

Uwing-uwi na ako. Waaahhhh... 

Have you ever been on either end of an unrequited love? 
Submitted by 怒涛の鮫.

Ha! What a classic spin-the-bottle question.

Ummm yes.

Me as Clueless Friend: Had a guy bestfriend in the first year in college. We hung out everyday and I shrugged off any clues and questions if we were a couple. After all, he was almost like a brother to me. I absolutely had no idea that he was into me until he told me one night in early 1999. My only reaction when he was crying to me was; "Seryoso ka ba?" Unintentionally heartless. The running joke among my friends was it was his constant hanging out at my dorm that got him kicked out from school because he didnt do any studying to be with me. My friends say that he was still into me for about 6 more years after that. I dont really know if thats true; havent seen him since 2006. He will always be a great friend. Hope he's doing okay.

Me as Spurned Lover: Fell for a boy with a girlfriend. He fell for me too, or so it seems, and I hung on to his every word for the next 5 years. I waited and waited; had relationships that I hoped would put an end to the madness I got myself into. He was actually a big part of my decision of moving here; to get away and start over.

But anyway, what's done is done. The rest of my life is happening now. No more Miss Misery. =)

Right now, I'm drinking ice-cold Nai Cha from my Starbucks water bottle.

And listening to dance punk blaring from my Skullcandy headphones.

These two simple things make me feel like I'm home again. And like I'm still working in PSRC.

And it's almost like I can expect Karlam to ask me to join her when she has to smoke.

Or that Claire or Pops will pop me about something,

and I can almost hear Ate Gina's ever-familiar playlist.

And that in a few minutes, Kuya Edison will walk in, and Manang Marina will call out, "merienda".

Weird. I never realized that the work place that I "hated"; and that I was so eager to leave became sort of my comfort zone.

I miss my routine. I miss PSRC.

It rained last night. It doesnt happen often; not in this part of the world, and I totally missed it. Maybe I didnt hear it because I was wearing headphones while listening to a new CD; (BTW, you guys should buy "Under Southern Lights" by Udub) OR maybe I was that dead to the world when I slept.

I woke up, enjoying the cold weather I have now grown accustomed to and got ready for work. Fried something canned for lunch; prepared and ate breakfast. Long shower, quickie wardrobe change.

Thought it was just an ordinary day.  Then, I got really sentimental when I got to the office.

I never thought receiving an email would hurt so much. It sucks to know that someone is about to leave you.

"Love Ridden"-- Fiona Apple

Love ridden, I've looked at you
With the focus I gave to my birthday candles
I've wished on the lidded blue flames
Under your brow
And baby, I wished for you

Nobody sees when you are lying in your bed
And I wanna crawl in with you
But I cry instead
I want your warm, but it will only make
Me colder when it's over,
So I can't tonight, baby

No, not "baby" anymore - if I need you
I'll just use your simple name
Only kisses on the cheek from now on
And in a little while, we'll only have to wave

My hand won't hold you down no more
The path is clear to follow through
I stood too long in the way of the door
And now I'm giving up on you

No, not "baby" anymore- if I need you
I'll just use your simple name
Only kisses on the cheek from now on
And in a little while, we'll only have to wave

No, not "baby" anymore- if I need you
I'll just use your simple name
Only kisses on the cheek from now on
And in a little while, we'll only have to wave

I got your message, couldn't call you back
I was busy getting you off my mind
I saw your girlfriend, I think she thinks I want you back
God you surely take your time
I don't want to be in your fantasy
I wish you'd move to China or the moon

Postive
Capital P
Positive
You don't belong to me

I'm kind of scattered like the pieces of a puzzle
But our pieces never seem to fit and I talk to the mirror
Looking deep into my eyes but I only see this
Don't want to be in your diary
I didn't mean it when I wished you away

Positive
Capital P
Positive
You were meant to be

You're the reason the stars always shine
And I believed it when you said you'd always be mine
I heard a rumor that you still talk about me
Makes me wanna cry

And I like your girlfriend, she could almost be my sister
Damn I wanna die
Don't want to be in your fantasy
I wish you'd move to China or the moon

Positive
Capital P
Positive
You were meant for me

--"Positive" by Marry Me Jane

Last Sunday, we took out the 2 Mums for dinner (my treat) in our new favorite restaurant, Tempura Grill. BTW, if you love Japanese, you should try this place. It's like a Japanese North Park. Yum yum... Okay, enough about the dinner; because I really cant get over how great the food was...

I want to salute and fawn over the 2 Mums of my life. *mushmode.

My Mum. Victoria Cuyno Artista.

Classic Mum lines: "Peew, pagdali... Ma-late na ka!"

"Peew, panghipos kuno gamay beh?"

To Enzo: "Ayaw sa Doy."

To me: "Totoy ng ina! Deputa"

Mama

She is a loud, fun, on-the-go, no-nonsense, organized Mum. She scolds me for being a slowpoke and because I dont fix up my room. Ahehehe..I am lucky because my Mum is very indulgent and understanding. She is very sensitive and only looks out for us. Actually, that's all she does. Everything she does is for us. I lurv her screaming sneeze... Hihihihii...

My Mum is a MILF, as you can see (I can attest to that; I have a few guyfriends who fantasize about her... eewww!). I think I never thanked her enough for putting up with my hangups. She prays for me constantly and gets really hurt when I'm hurting.

Love you Mum!

Mum number two. My twin, Frances Marie Cuyno Artista.

Classic Tata lines: "Enzo, mamatay kog sayo nimo!"

"Enzo, no"

"Babe, I'm very angry"

"I'm not cut out for this shit."

"Kiss your Mum, I dont care if you're a big boy, I can kiss you anytime I want"

mom and enzo

 

My supermum twin. She's my idol. Working on ungodly hours, she brings home the bacon to raise a man. Her career decisions and life plans now revolve around Enzo (aka Psycho Loco-Loco Mr. Baba). She winces in pain when her boisterous kid headbutts her repeatedly and cries silently when Enzo gives her another bruise. Yes, it aint easy to be a Mom to a 3 year old boy.

But amidst all the pain, she gives an LOL (Look of Love) every 3 minutes. I swear, I'm gonna catch one on camera and post it here. She loves him unconditionally. Nothing compares. Sometimes, I envy her; telling her, "you're life is planned out na Ta." And I ask her, "Any regrets?" She answers without a blink, "None. I cant imagine my life without him now that I have him."

 

Sometimes you just forget the rules, Follow your heart and see where it takes you... Never apologize for saying what you feel Because that's like saying sorry for being real... Never regret anything you said or did Because at some point, it was what you wanted... True strength is being able to hold it all together when everyone else is expecting you to fall apart...

The best gift anyone can give me this new year is a planner. I like planners because I am a planner.

I like thinking ahead. I like being prepared. I get a high from being on top of things.

 But some things are beyond planning. And life doesn't always turn out as planned.

You don't plan for a broken heart. You don't plan for a failed business venture. You don't plan for an adulterous husband. Or a wife who wants you out of her life. You don't plan for an autistic child. You don't plan for spinsterhood. You don't plan for a lump in your breast. You plan to be young forever.

You plan to climb the corporate ladder. You plan to be rich and powerful. You plan to be acclaimed and successful. You plan to conquer the universe. You plan to fall in love - and be loved forever.

 You don't plan to be sad. You don't plan to be hurt. You don't plan to be broke. You don't plan to be betrayed. You don't plan to be alone in this world You plan to be happy. You don't plan to be shattered. Sometimes if you work hard enough, you can get what you want. But most times, what you want and what you get are two different things.

We, mortals, plan. But so does God in the heavens.

Sometimes, it is difficult to understand God's plans especially when His plans are not in consonance with ours.

Often, when God sends us crisis, we turn to Him in anger. True, we cannot choose the cross that God wishes us to carry, But we can carry that cross with courage knowing that God will never abandon us nor send something we cannot cope with. Sometimes, God breaks our spirit to save our soul.

Sometimes, He breaks our heart to make us whole. Sometimes, God sends us pain so we can be stronger. Sometimes, God sends us failure so we can be humble. Sometimes God sends us illness so we can take better care of ourselves. Sometimes, God takes everything away from us so we can learn the value of everything He gave us.

Make plans but understand that we live by God's grace.

--Shared by Joe Gatuslao Bacolod City, Philippines